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Hundreds of young people have contacted YHL. We hear about many difficulties, varying in topic and degree of severity. All concerns are treated with the same high regard. Although there is a wide range of issues addressed by YHL, the most common areas are that callers seem to be concerned about are: These issues are discussed here. Self-Image You look in the mirror and you are either happy with what you see or not. The reflection you see may be your physical appearance -- complexion, hair, weight -- or the picture you portray, being confident or shy. Your self-image plays an important part in how you feel about yourself and how you think others perceive you. Your self-worth, self-reliance, and ability to communicate with others are closely related with how you view yourself. The media, be it electronic or print, bombards us with images that tell us we live in a world full of beautiful people. The pressure to have the right body shape, wear the right outfits and to be full of self-confidence is a tall order to aim for, especially for a teenager. Many young people compare themselves to these images and often come to the conclusion they are not meeting the standards set by the media or even by their own peer group. Thankfully, most of you realize that these expectations are unrealistic. You realize that living up to certain stereotypes is not what life is all about. There are times, however, when you feel down or unsure about yourself; when you start to question who you are and when you don't feel as good about yourself as you should. Sometimes this can have a spiraling negative effect and soon you feel depressed. There are times when things can get worse. Others may comment negatively on your clothes, hair, or belongings. You may be called names and made fun of because you are overweight or have freckles. You may even get bullied because you wear glasses. It is these times when you are at your most vulnerable. And when you look in the mirror, you may start to agree with the comments. YHL receives dozens of calls from teens asking for the secret to self-confidence. Unfortunately, there is no magic portion we can give or prescribe, but we are here to support and guide you. For example: take time out and just look carefully at the people making these comments. Are they perfect? Definitely not! Now take a look at your strengths and weaknesses. Try to talk to friends about how you feel. Obviously this is easier said than done, but by starting to become more confident and believing in yourself, your self-image will begin to improve. Don't worry; there is hope and there is help! Don't give up! Puberty (Physical Changes) For most adults, the characteristics that set adolescents apart most clearly are the physical changes of puberty. Of course, important personality changes go along with physical growth. But, if adolescence has a single defining characteristic, it is the dramatic bodily changes of early adolescence. This is a period of the most intense and extensive biological changes since birth. Both boys and girls express dissatisfaction with their perceptions of their bodies during adolescence. YHL receives countless phone calls regarding questions from feelings of distress over weight, height, or acne to confusion over sexual arousal, sexuality, family planning, masturbation, STDS, and even AIDS. For a young person to have these questions is perfectly normal and, in fact, healthy. We at YHL try to assist you in understanding what is happening to your bodies including ways in which you can cope better (in a healthy and constructive way) while you pass through this stage. Education and Career All of us have been through the tension of deciding which college or university one should join or whether one should become a doctor or an engineer, teacher or lawyer, join the army or work in the government. Education and career choices such as these often baffle and, at times, overwhelm an individual, especially a young person whose parents may be pushing him/her to take up medicine, while he or she wants to do masters in computer sciences. An understanding of the relationship between what an adolescent's potential and inclinations are and what future career choice should be made is often lacking and/or ignored. Here at YHL, we fully understand how important decision making and planning for the future really is. Once you call us with your predicament, we will guide you through it and hopefully bring you towards a more clearer and specific outcome. Emotional Well-Being (Mental Health) Everyone has days when they feel sad, down, or depressed. Fortunately, most people also have happy, enjoyable, and fulfilling days. This is what emotional well-being is about. It is how one feels from within. When life is going well, no-one really worries, but when things start going downhill one feels unhappy and unable to cope with regular day-to-day tasks. Feeling low, stressed out, or depressed affects every part of our lives. You may find it difficult to concentrate, not be able to have fun or get a good night's sleep. Often feeling down may be short- term, but for some young people it may become a normal daily occurrence that can get worse. Often people call and write to YHL expressing how unhappy they are. Sometimes people tell us how their depression leads to self-harm and suicidal thoughts. Many people find that talking about their concerns helps. You may be fortunate enough to have friends and family who will listen to you, but there are many people who feel that there is no-one to turn to. YHL is here to help you. We listen to you, support you, and provide you with information that can help you to cope better. We offer confidentiality so you can be sure that no one else will be told about your problem. Family Family relationships are an important social and emotional resource in an adolescent's life. Family experiences have far reaching implications for adolescents outside the family -- in relationship with peers, teachers, and other adults; in romantic involvements; in academic performance; and in the eventual occupational choice and degree of success. Most of the youngsters who call YHL share their annoyance and frustration about how their experiences are different from that of other family members (especially siblings) and of how they feel that their parents don't listen or try to understand their point of view. A given family may be nuclear or joint, or it may be a single parent home. No matter what the set-up, as a teenager you may feel the need to unburden yourself and talk about family concerns and issues. You may feel like venting the anger that you feel towards your mother for being so lenient with your elder brother, or towards your father for not letting you take the car out. Being the only child you may feel like sharing your concerns with someone other than your parents, or it may be something more serious like having an abusive parent. Here at YHL, we fully understand the strain and pressure you may be going through with regards to your daily interactions with your family and we are here to share your concerns and hear your story! Call us and let yourself be heard! Relationships Along with the physical and emotional changes that occur during adolescence, there arises the difficulty of developing and maintaining relationships, not only with parents, siblings, and peers, but most importantly with the opposite sex. It is important to remember that you start forming relationships on the basis of common feelings and interests rather than common activities alone. Although as kids doing things with others seems to be the main basis of friendship, as you grow older you are likely to seek friends with whom you can share thoughts and feelings. And you start moving from same sex relationships (your buddies, chums, yaars, saheliyan) to mixed-sex relations (girlfriends and boyfriends). Boys develop an interest in girls and girls become curious about boys. Once a heterosexual relationship starts developing, most teenagers start having questions about whether they are in love. Is it true love or just a passing phase, a 'crush' or an 'infatuation'? At this point, queries regarding intimacy, choosing the right partner, and marriage start emerging. YHL gives you the opportunity to talk about where your life is going and with whom!
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YOUTH HELP LINE 
